Hattie McDaniel

I went to CVS to buy face moisturizer and Q-tips, two seemingly random but very necessary items, I've come to discover. When I got to the front of the line, the cashier asked if I had a CVS card. I said No. Then without batting an eye she pulled a membership application form from underneath the register, scanned the new card, and gave me all the paperwork to fill out later.

I was confused.

I said, "Excuse me madam, but if its that easy to become a member and get CVS discounts, why even bother with the cards?"

"Whachoo talkin' bout," she asked.

I answered.

In more words or less, I made it obvious that to me it seems that if any bipedal creature walks through the door, they can get a discount card. Why not just screw the discount cards altogether and just give everyone the damn discount.

But then again, whats the purpose of the damn discount? It seems that if the store's willing to slash prices for certain items to make them attractive to people, why not just cut the bullcrap and price items for what they're really worth?

If I'm a member of the store and I can get a 2% discount on every purchase--one of the perks of using the card--why can't you just cut all the prices in the store by the same amount? Your membership club doesn't strike me as particularly exclusive, so what's the deal, seriously?

"Isn't that nonsensical," I said to the burly woman after explaining things to her.

"You know, you right. But ah' guess it must be some advertising thang.. make people feel special even tho it don't mean nothin'," she said with a slick urban accent.

Damn!! Good answer!!! Before I knew it I was shaking my head in agreement wondering why this woman wasn't working in PR or at an advertising firm. Maybe if she didn't sound like a ghetto Hattie McDaniel from Gone with the Wind she might achieve loftier ambitions.